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Deci romnii nu mai tiu cuvinte sau cum rul anceput de la AlecsandriOctober 19, 2014

1)(Dialog, n Patul lui Procustal luiCmil Petrescu, intre narator i tntavoluptoasa):

i-a aezat puin o perin sub ea,

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A structural com parison of Etruscan with the

Kartvelian languagesNovember 16, 2015

Cap. I Unde naratorul o ntlne te pe Maja, otreapa

creativ cu bluz pe gtNovember 13, 2015
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ntoars spre mine, cu mijlocul suci t,accentund o dung de carne plin,oblica peste coaste, n dreptul coatelor,cci iretul cmuei i lunecase de peumr pn jos, pe bra.

Un tip pe care nu-l cunoti. Era puincam haloims, dar era simpatic.

Surde strmb. Eu:

Ce e haloims?

Nu tii, serios?

Nu tiu. Spune-mi!

Nu tiu cum s-i spun Se zice de cineva care e aaaa (i, gndindu-se, cu

buza scurt): Cum s-i zic? (i hotrt): Haloims, na! aaaa, cu figuri.

2)Deci la nceput Dumnezeu a fcut cerul i pmntul.Deci pmntul eranetocmit i gol i deci ntuneric era deasupra adncului.

(deci: Facerea, I, 1-2)

Mi neam romnesc, mi, de ce-i ncepi fiecare a doua fraz prin deci, cci i-aifcut Dumnezeul deciuitor, n loc de legiuitor n decii decilor.

Deci, romnii nu mai tiu cuvinte

n afar de deci, care ncepe fiecare a doua fraz, remarcm cu consternare cromnii nu prea mai tiu multe cuvinte (cf. proasta lui Camil Petrescu cu haloims).

Am avut aceast cutremurtoare revelaie trecnd zilele astea prin nite proz nou,

Obscenul supliciu al lui Gheorghe Doja n literatura

neoclasic englezNovember 8, 2015

Democraia hazardului, sau cum s ne tragem

politicienii la s oriNovember 6, 2015

007: Spectre (2015) cnd James Bond seam n cu

Putin, plictisul n plusNovember 4, 2015

Sincretismul de HalloweenNovember 1, 2015

The Walk (2015): un film de nevzut fr ochelarii 3D

October 29, 2015

Lumea ca spoial i nfometareOctober 27, 2015

Coapsa de aur. Alchimie i retenie seminal

n AvignonOctober 26, 2015

Cum mi-am uzurpat natura de drag queenOctober 25,

2015

Sicario (2015) thriller-ul post-post-modern capatchwork eficaceOctober 24, 2015

ipora Haiastan: ora et adoraOctober 15, 2015

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dar i prin articole din presa naional, att cea tiprit, ct i pe internet i amrmas nmrmurit, dndu-mi seama c de multe ori nici nu nelegeam sensul unorformule lemnoase pe care degetele necugettoare ale scriitorilor ziaritilor le btuseracolo n sperana c vor acoperi un gnd cznit. Romnii nu mai tiu cuvinte, i atuncivorbesc i scriu n expresii i golnisme gata fcute, crmidue golite de sens iinteranjabile.

Vezi ti tluri n pres precum: Legea nvmntului: Bse o d cotit! Hai s trecem

peste Bse, care prin repetare i-a pierdut nuana de zeflemea, dar dac autorul ar fide fa, n genunchi de preferin, i-ar veni s-l bai cu slbticie, pocnindu-l cutastatura peste gur i rcnindu-i: Ce-ai vrut s spui, tmpitule, c o d cotit? Aivrut s spui c amn? C tergiverseaz? C ezit? De ce zici m: o d cotit?De ce? De ce? i s-i nfunzi mausul n cel mai apropiat orificiu, cznindu-l pnreuete s spun ce voia, n cuvinte cu sens, nu cu haloims i nu cudeci la fiecarea doua fraz.

Nici mcar cnd insult nu pot fi originali, ocara politic cea mai folosit fiind de obiceineimaginativul i mortul pupincurist iar cei care simt totui c e aici o problem,

nu reuesc s o fac dect n mod amorf, pentru c nu mai tiu destule cuvinte.

Unii ursulei care m citesc livizi i-au artat limitele, cnd le-am atras atentia ca lechioapt Logosul, tratndu-m de muist Pi s nu te-apuci s bei de disperare?

Iat ns c descopr cu oroare c

viermele e ra n fruct de la nceput i

c, de pild, obiceiul de a ncepe

frazele prin conjuncia deci, acrei prezen e nejustificat de

textul anterior, este foarte vechi.

Chiar Alecsandri, Dumnezeule,inDan Cpitan de plai,dup ce ni-lprezint pe erou i ne spune c a

mbtrnit, ncepe o strof cu:

Deci i plcea s-nfrunte cu dalba-ivitejiePe cei care prin lume purtau bici de

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urgie.

i, dup ce rmi nmrmurit o

clipit, mai departe:

Deci nu-mi convine viaa mielnic ctigat,

Nici pata frdelegii n fruntea mea spat.

Turandot i metafora fezandat

mi propusesem, din rafinamentfezandat, sa recitesc n searatrecut Zodia Cancerului (sau Vremea

Duci vod)a lui Sadoveanu Amrenuntat, prins de convulsii nefireti,ajuns la episodul in care Abatele deMarenne, trimis al regelui Frantei laPoart, se ndrgosteste brusc deMoldova, pe care o traversase reticent,dar iat c d de o pdure mreaunde i se spune ca snt zimbri:

Abatele se simi ptruns de un

simmnt de evlavie, privind minuneadumnezeirii, ntr-o clip strlucit s i

fr preche n eternitate.

Pe lnga revelatia faptului c oruleul masonic pare a avea la unii efecte devastatoareasupra calitii outputului literar, asta mi-a revelat statutul metaforei burduhnoase laromni. Ea a fost ntotdeauna pitit n miezul literaturii, s tricnd pn i cele maibanale texte descriptive. Necrutorul Fundoianu, comentnd (in Rampa, 28 august1921) volumul Amintiri din Junimea al lui Iacob Negruzzi, unde fostul redactor de
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la Convorbiri Literarepovestete, necate in zeci de pagini anoste, cateva anecdoteedifiante (precum atunci cnd s-a dus la Veronica Micle sa-i spuna ca a innebunitEminescu Indiferenta, Veronica ar fi zis : A innebunit Mihai? Se vedea de mult caaa o s-ajung), Fundoianu aadar exclam: Pentru pagina asta, i-as ierta intregvolumul. Dar cine l-a pus, oh, cine l-a pus sa scrie despre Eminescu:acest brbatimens?!!

Prin pasiunea imoderat pentru metafor i adjective burduhnoase, literatura romn

et ca un fel de Turandot pe dos Iat: daca in varianta ecumenica Turandot ii obligape peitori sa-si declame amorul in vorbe miestre, anuntand ca se va drui celui cucel mai meteugit discurs, iar pe ceilalti dndu-i casapului spre hcuial, la romniticaloasa de Rusalca cere invers, un lucru care se adevereste infinit mai greu: anunc se va da celui care va ticlui discursul cel mai plat, fraza cea mai ins ipid, oiniruire de vorbe searbede dar sincere care ar fi att de implauzibil de plate incat arexista riscul ca ea s aipeasc pe veci devenind Frumoasa din Padurea Adormita!

Intelegand asta, se caznesc tinerii retori sa-si destrame intortocheatele tehnicidiscursive, s un-learn ceea ce le-ar fi fcut nulee de retoric prin creier. Drace,

hai s-o uimim pe-asta prin platitudine sincera, d-le-ncolo de artificii si vine unul sispune : Destinul e o camila oarb, iar Turandot: La clu cu el. A indraznit sa maiaib o urma de originalitate iar altul: Ochii tai s int ca nestematele din bolta noptii,tra-la-la, dar hmesita T. : La roat cu el. Inca a mai aratat convingere in ce rahatpretenios spune

Si, desigur, la urma vine Gruia, sau Boldur, you name him, necolit in retoric darsincer si transparent ca un bou facut din ap grea, si-i trage fara sa-i cracneascavreun muchi al feei o tirada att de fad, att de neted i vid in perfecta platitudinesincer a goliciunii ei de sens, de cade pe spate extaziat sraca Turandot

Literatura Romn, pn la urm i ea doar o femeie.

-

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de-stil-un-prim-draft-de-10-reguli/

Despre Alecsandri, cf. i aici:

Imi venea sa-l strng de gt n numele Domnuluihttps://cabalinkabul.wordpress.com/2013/01/20/imi-venea-sa-l-string-de-git-in-

numele-domnului/

Nicolae Gane nu-i imagina c femeile vor vorbi cupula meahttps://cabalinkabul.wordpress.com/2013/05/30/nicolae-gane-nu-si-imagina-ca-

femeile-vor-vorbi-cu-pula-mea/

Despre oroarea de lingvistic la junimea:

Finn negans neic : ADN-ul nelingvistic al romnului(sau din nou despre ignorana lui Hasdeu)https://cabalinkabul.wordpress.com/2013/05/29/finn-negans-neica-adn-ul-

nelingvistic-al-romanului-sau-din-nou-despre-ignoranta-lui-hassdeu/

Despre junimea din perspectiv burlesc, piesa mea:

1875: EMINESCU LA CREANGAhttps://cabalinkabul.wordpress.com/2014/07/19/1875-eminescu-la-creanga/

In sfrit, despre o Turandot dus i mai departe :

Jucnd teatru: diferena dintre amnezici i piticihttps://cabalinkabul.wordpress.com/2013/01/28/jucind-teatru-diferenta-dintre-

amnezici-si-pitici/

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